Who’s your bestie? My daughter tells me that I am hers. She also says her cat is her bestie. Some people have one best friend. Others have a lot of close friends. I like to call my best friends my inner circle. I have many besties or people in my inner circle. I am blessed to have a close relationship with both my son and daughter, and I consider them besties. My two sisters are also my besties. Then, my friend Renee, is my bestie. I also consider my significant other my best friend. We share things that I don’t share with others.
My son tells me he has friends for different things. Some times we try to make our friends be all things. My son has figured out how to play to people’s strengths. Some friends are gym friends. Some friends are church friends. Some friends are mentors. Some friends cross into multiple groups, but my son respects individuals and puts them in a place to succeed and excel. We all need friends like him.
Another one of my friends has a friend named Sarah. She is a wild, loyal, fun, intelligent and energetic woman. Our friends have remarked that everyone needs a Sarah. What or who do you need? How do you celebrate your friends? Who do you draw close to for certain things? Who do you enjoy spending time with?
This month we will focus on friends and the tiny steps you can take to improve those relationships. Start first by thinking about your friends and what you bring to each other. One of my friends gave me a magnet I cherish which says, “When I count my blessings, I count you twice.” I feel the same way about her.
My life is pretty busy. I’ve been called a dabbler, and while that is true, I still believe that one day soon all of my dabbling will collide and allow me to focus all my energy on one thing that brings me the most joy and helps the most people. I work three jobs - one full time and two part time - as I launch another business. I dedicate time to fitness, journaling, my spiritual life, my family, my friends and my significant other - in no particular order. I’m also a baker, love to read and garden and you have a good idea why people call me a dabbler. As a result, not everyone gets a place in my life. I think this is ok. I had a friend growing up that I would make excuses for, constantly. When we were together, things were great. But many times, our plans would get cancelled or there would be no follow up. Guess what? This person no longer gets my time. I extend a lot of compassion to people, but relationships should be give and take, respectful and considerate.
In my life, I choose to fill my time with positive people who mutually respond to me and have similar interests. My idea of a fun time with a friend is a summer run followed by a mimosa and some catch-up time on the deck overlooking the lake. I also enjoying playing tennis, board games and card games with my family. I love rooftop bars, golfing and traveling too. I choose to be intentional about my time, and you should too.
When you think about your friends and the people you most enjoy, what attracts you to them and what attracts them to you? What kind of a friend do you want to be? What kind of friends do you want to have?
I think most of us would agree that experiences matter. Most likely you have had some great experiences with your besties. You might have been there for each other during tough times, and you probably have had some belly laughs that made you worry about peeing your pants. All of that is friendship.
This week, consider sending out notes to your friends. If you write thank you notes for holiday gifts, add a special comment about what their friendship means to you. Otherwise, consider sending a note or a card to your friends reminding them of a great experience together and wishing them a great 2022 where you look forward to exciting, new experiences together. Or just simply thank them for being in your life. That’s powerful too.
Thank you for reading. Wishing you beauty & joy, kindness and compassion.
To build your Friendship Super Powers, commit to writing to 1-3 of your friends.
This month’s Super Powers focus is on building friendships.
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Our goal is to guide you with small, easy steps to improve many areas of your life. Over time these small changes will add up to significant growth and improvement. You will be amazed at how far you have come when you look back at all your progress.